50 Funniest Online Jokes About Nursing – Laughter Is The Best Medicine

Nurses work long hours helping others, often without much rest. A good laugh can help boost morale and relieve stress.

This collection of “50 Funniest Online Jokes About Nursing – Laughter Is The Best Medicine” aims to give nurses some humor and levity with jokes that will make them chuckle.

From punny one-liners to longer funny stories, this article covers a range of nursing humor [including cheesy pickup lines that could even pass as jokes].

Whether you need a quick laugh or want to share some amusement with fellow nurses, this roundup provides comedic bites full of nursing wit and whimsy to light

50 Funniest Online Jokes About Nursing

  1. “Why did the nurse keep the bedpan in the freezer? To chill the stool sample!”
  2. “How many nurses does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they just have a nursing student do it.”
  3. “Why was the nurse always calm? She had a lot of patients!”
  4. “What’s a nurse’s favorite type of tree? An IV!”
  5. “Why did the nurse carry a red pen? In case she needed to draw blood.”
  6. “What do you call a nurse with a bad back? An RN in pain.”
  7. “Why don’t nurses play cards? They don’t want to deal with hearts.”
  8. “How does a nurse stop a heart attack? By pressing Ctrl-Alt-Delete!”
  9. “Why did the nurse tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? So she wouldn’t wake the sleeping pills.”
  10. “Why did the nurse keep a ruler? To measure their patience.”
  11. “What do you call a nurse who is great at finding veins? A vampire!”
  12. “Why did the nurse always carry a needle? To knit her brows.”
  13. “What’s a nurse’s favorite game? Operation!”
  14. “Why do nurses always carry a syringe? For shots and giggles.”
  15. “Why did the nurse bring string to the bar? To tie one on after a long shift.”
  16. “Why did the nurse go to art school? To learn how to draw blood.”
  17. “What do you call a nurse with a knee injury? An RN (Registered ‘Not-running’).”
  18. “Why are nurses always calm? Because they have strong nerves.”
  19. “Why did the nurse avoid the sun? She didn’t want to deal with another burn.”
  20. “What’s a nurse’s favorite hobby? Cross-stitching.”
  21. “Why did the nurse bring a ladder to work? To reach new heights in patient care.”
  22. “What’s a nurse’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good beat.”
  23. “Why did the nurse like needles? She had a sharp sense of humor.”
  24. “What do you call a nurse who can do it all? A ‘multi-tusk-er’!”
  25. “Why did the nurse always win at poker? She had a great poker face when dealing with pain.”
  26. “Why was the nurse always happy at work? She found joy in every ‘vein’!”
  27. “What do you call a nurse with a map? A ‘nursevigator’!”
  28. “Why are nurses good at baseball? They’re experts at catching Z’s.”
  29. “What do nurses and comedians have in common? Great timing!”
  30. “Why did the nurse carry a toothbrush? To brush up on patient care.”
  31. “What do you call a nurse with dirty hands? Unemployed.”
  32. “Why did the nurse always laugh? Because it’s the best medicine!”
  33. “What’s a nurse’s least favorite game? Sick-tac-toe.”
  34. “Why did the nurse become a gardener? She had a growing interest in patient’s well-bean.”
  35. “Why did the nurse take a ladder to work? She was moving up in the world.”
  36. “What’s a nurse’s favorite dance move? The ‘I.V. Drip.’”
  37. “Why did the nurse go to the beach? To ‘wave’ goodbye to stress.”
  38. “What do you call a nurse with a broken leg? A ‘hop-ital’ worker.”
  39. “Why did the nurse always wear gloves? To have a hand in everything.”
  40. “What’s a nurse’s favorite snack? ‘Pressure’ cookies.”
  41. “Why was the nurse good at tennis? She had a great serve.”
  42. “What do you call a nurse in a library? A ‘book-keeper’ of health.”
  43. “Why did the nurse like the elevator? It lifted her spirits.”
  44. “What’s a nurse’s favorite type of party? A ‘pulse’ party.”
  45. “Why did the nurse always carry a fan? To stay cool under pressure.”
  46. “What do you call a nurse who’s a great cook? A ‘souper’ hero.”
  47. “Why did the nurse like autumn? Because of the falling leaves (leave days).”
  48. “What’s a nurse’s favorite animal? A ‘bandage’!”
  49. “Why did the nurse love the moon? It had a calming ‘lunar’ effect.”
  50. “What do you call a nurse who loves to travel? A ‘globe-trotting’ caregiver!”

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